Proper Josephs with Ale & Brown Sugar

We are adults.  It's a new year, a clean slate, and we should try to resist eating popcorn and cereal for dinner for at least a couple more weeks.  With a whole year in front of us, there is no better time to begin arming ourselves with solid, dependable, realistic weeknight dinners. 

I know it looks like all I do is take pictures of cookies and drink tea beside the Christmas tree.  But sadly and probably thankfully, we do not eat Lobster Macaroni & Cheese for dinner every night. Sometimes, I just need to use up my leftover ground beef. 

That whole "necessity is the mother of invention" thing ain't no lie.

I heated some oil in the frying pan, tossed in some garlic, and browned the beef.  

My grievance with sloppy joes has always been related to the sweetness factor.  In my mind, this humble, homey classic requires some degree of brown-sugary sweetness, but at times it goes a bit too far.  

I still like my dinner to maintain its savory integrity.  Oh, and do not even get me started on the whole bell pepper thing.  No, just no.

I wanted these sloppy joes to strike the perfect balance between sweet and savory, and It turns out that a leftover bottle of ale was just the ticket.  

The ale brings a welcome depth of flavor and unmistakable yeasty tang to this sloppy joe filling.

After the first bite I knew the remnants of my refrigerator had inspired something truly special. Something that had far too much sophistication of flavor to be called "sloppy." 

While these are not exactly the most elegant of sandwiches, Mr. Pedantic & I both agreed that in the world of sloppy joes, these were the Hapsburgs.  Hence the updated, and more deserving title - Proper Josephs.  

The ingredients are far from fussy, save the indulgent brioche buns, but the final reward is a true delight. 

Go ahead, put a little faux-fancy in your week. 

Sincerely, 

Pedantic Foodie

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Proper Josephs

serves 2 (or 4 smaller sandwiches) 

- 1 tablespoon olive oil

- 1 large clove garlic 

- 1/2 lb ground beef (I used 80/20)

- 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt

- 1 bay leaf 

- 1 1/2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce 

- 8 ounces tomato sauce

- 1/4 cup amber ale 

- 2-3 tablespoons dark brown sugar 

- 2 brioche buns 

- 2 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened

In a medium, nonstick frying pan, heat olive oil over medium heat until it begins to shimmer.  Add garlic and cook for 1-2 minutes, until it just begins to brown.  

Add your ground beef and use a spatula to break up the meat, then add the salt and bay leaf and cook until the meat is evenly browned.   

Once the meat has browned, add ale and cook for 1-2 minutes.  Reduce heat slightly and add Worcestershire and tomato sauces.  

Allow the mixture to simmer on low heat for 8-10 minutes, until the sauce has thickened.  Stir in 2 tablespoons brown sugar, then taste and add an additional tablespoon if needed.  Whether or not this is necessary will greatly depend on the sweetness of your tomatoes. 

Remove the pan from the heat source and allow to cool slightly while you prepare the buns. 

Set your oven to the broiler setting and slice buns lengthwise.  Spread 1/2 tablespoon butter on each side of each bun and place on a set pan, cut-side up.  Place in the oven and toast until golden. 

Serve immediately.  Enjoy! 

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Pretzel Dogs - a love story

The words were still leaving my cousin's lips when I turned to my fiancé and said, "We have to, I need to taste that."  

Several days after Christmas we were with yet another group of family members, and my cousin began telling us about a new place downtown where everything was made into a pretzel.  Stuffed pretzels, pretzel pizzas, pretzel calzones (I died) and...pretzel-wrapped hot dogs.  

Now, you know that I'm a highly snobby, slightly pretentious food snob, but I do love and thoroughly enjoy a good hot dog.  It's my #1 guilty pleasure food.   Load it up with sweet pickles and I'm close to fainting with joy.  

So, it is no surprise that when I heard the words "pretzel-wrapped hot dogs" I grabbed my keys and begged someone to help me find this heavenly establishment.  I ordered without hesitation and, after a few, long moments of anticipation, I was holding a bag of happiness.  The greasy, sweet, butter leaked through the brown paper bag and the perfume of freshly baked, yeasty dough consumed my senses.  This was going to be good.  

I ate it all.  Well, I had to share a little bit with my fiancé, but he got no more than a small bite.  It was everything I had dreamed it would be, and at that moment I knew I was going to create my own version of this delicacy at home. 

The task was really a simple one, and I am no stranger to pretzel-making.  I began by making a batch of my favorite pretzel dough and then waited eagerly for it to rise.  I chose the fancy all-beef, no nitrate hot dogs because that is the only kind I can will myself to buy, but if you would like to go for something a bit more traditional - well, I won't tell. 

The hardest part of this recipe is wrapping the hot dogs.  It is not overly difficult, but the hot dogs do tend to resist being wrapped up at times.  I dried mine a bit to remove any excess moisture that would prevent the dough from clinging as it should.  

This video shows the simplicity of the wrapping process, as well as my mad dough-rolling skills.  Ha. Haha.  Kidding.  Oh, and that bench scraper is also my highly sophisticated kitchen ruler.

 After the dogs have been swaddled, they are boiled for thirty seconds in a baking soda bath.  The reason for this is threefold.  First, the baking soda will assist with browning and give the pretzels that deep, mahogany color.  Second, the baking soda will also give our pretzels that pretzel-y taste we all love.  Lastly, the boiling will give the bread a lovely, chewy texture.  

Do not even think about skipping this step!  An unboiled pretzel is not a pretzel.  

After their bath, these pretzels receive a coating of egg wash and a heavy sprinkling of kosher salt. 

I once tried to make pretzels with regular old table salt.  The result was less than pleasing.  It's gotta be the coarse stuff.  

While the pretzels were baking, I turned my attention to a dip.  The dog I ordered was served with honey mustard and it was fantastic, but I wanted something different.  At the time, I was also thinking that these would make pretty amazing game day food and then I thought of a bunch of guys screaming on the couch, and then I thought of beer and cheese, and then I made this wonderful mess. 

As soon as the pretzels come out of the oven they are brushed with melted butter to make them just a little bit more wonderful.  

Portion the dip into little bowls, there is no way around double-dipping when it comes to hot, melty cheese dip.  

Classically succulent hot dogs enveloped in soft, salty, buttery pretzels.  Could it get any better?  I think not.  

Sincerely, 

Pedantic Foodie

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Pretzel Dogs with Smoked Gouda & Beer Dip

pretzel recipe slightly adapted from Alton Brown / makes eight

for the pretzels

• 1 1/2 cups warm water

• 3 tablespoons granulated sugar

• 2 teaspoons kosher salt

• 1 package active dry yeast

• 22 ounces all-purpose flour, roughly 4 1/2 cups

• 2 ounces unsalted butter, melted

• vegetable oil, for greasing

• 8 all-beef hot dogs

• 10 cups water

• 2/3 cup baking soda

• egg wash (1 egg yolk beaten with 1 teaspoon of water)

• course-ground kosher salt or sea salt

In the bowl of your stand mixer combine 1 1/2 cups warm water, sugar, and kosher salt.  Sprinkle yeast on top and allow to sit for 5 minutes or until foamy. 

Add the flour and melted butter to the yeast mixture and fit your mixer with the dough hook attachment.  Mix on low speed until the flour and butter are well incorporated.  Change the speed to medium and knead until the dough is smooth and begins to pull away from the sides of the bowl.  This will take about 5 minutes.  

Remove the dough gently and place in a large bowl greased with vegetable oil.  Cover with a damp towel and place in a warm place to rise for 1 hour, or until doubled in size. 

Preheat your oven to 450 degrees.  Line two baking sheets with parchment paper.  

In a large, heavy saucepan, combine baking soda with 10 cups of water.  Bring to a rolling boil.  

Turn the dough out unto a floured surface and portion into 8 equal pieces.  Roll each piece of dough into a 15-inch rope.  Wrap the rope around each hot dog, twisting tightly to form a case. 

Place the pretzels in the boiling water, one at a time, for 30 seconds.  Transfer the boiled pretzels to the prepared sheet pans.  Brush each pretzel with egg wash and sprinkle with salt.  

Bake the pretzels until they are deep golden brown, about 10-12 minutes.  While the pretzels are baking, prepare the dip.  

for the dip

• 2 tablespoons unsalted butter

• 1/4 cup all-purpose flour

• 1 teaspoon kosher salt

• 2 teaspoons ground mustard

• 1 cup whole milk

• 1 cup dark beer

• 3.5 ounces smoked gouda, shredded

• 3.5 ounces sharp cheddar, shredded

In a large saucepan, melt butter over medium heat.  Whisk in flour and cook, 1-2 minutes, until the flour has just started to brown.  

Whisk in salt, mustard, and milk.  Cook, stirring constantly, for 1 minute, until the milk has thickened, then add the beer.  Cook for an additional 3-4 minutes, until the mixture is smooth and the beer has cooked off slightly.  

Remove from heat and stir in shredded cheeses.

Pour the dip into an oven-safe pan and place under the broiler for 5-7 minutes, until the top has browned.  Serve immediately with freshly baked pretzel dogs.  Enjoy!