1 Week ! ! !

AHHHHHHHH!!!  Give me all the screaming face emojis. 

 I am getting married.  I am getting married in one week.  

(Actually, the one week mark was yesterday, but I wanted to write this post on the one week mark, not before.)

I am sorry if all this wedding talk is getting old, but we are almost done, I promise.  In fact, this is the last planned installment.  Sniff, sniff. 

Back in the summer, when I first decided to record the progress of this wedding chaos, I did so out of a desire to preserve.  I want to be able to look back and read what was going through my mind and confirm that it was mostly just a bunch of screaming emojis, happy heart eyes, and a few slightly annoyed eye rolls.  I know there are at least seven of you that have been reading these posts with utter delight and giddy intrigue.  I know, because that's exactly how I would be. I love getting all up in your business, so please, feel free to get all up in mine.  Whether or not I have googled you is the measure of how much I like your blog.  It's a nosiness motivated by dreams of imaginary friendship...and it is so much less creepy than it sounds. 

So, this wedding.  I've been planning it for nearly a year.  My person (lately I cannot seem to call him his actual name, it's all coming out in weird, sometimes grossly fifth grade nicknames and I am like "woah, why did that leave my mouth?!") and I got engaged on October 29th of last year, and on October 21st we will marry.  So, for 351 days I have been planning, anticipating, and gushing over this great event. 

As a child, I would always feel slightly ill on the first day of vacation, Christmas morning, or any long-awaited event.  I live off of anticipation, so when the treasure is finally in reach, my only wish is to go back.  I do not want to begin, because I do not want to end.

It is a bad habit that I am trying to conquer with Pinterest quotes that tell me to live in the moment.  It's bad, in that it often snatches away some of the joy of the event itself because I am so afraid of it being over. 

I knew this about myself when I became engaged, which is why I planned my wedding just before Thanksgiving, and Christmas, and all of those lovely distractions.  Despite my preparations, my melancholy prophesies are already beginning to come true as the great day approaches.  All of the planning, tears, and delights that have been planted over this year are about to blossom into this glorious day and then...what?  Then I get to go on an incredible honeymoon with an incredible man that I love and begin an exciting new normal.  So much excitement still looms on the horizon, and yet I cannot help begging the days to slow down.  This year has been so much fun.  I have loved being engaged.  It has been the best time of my life.  All the anxiety and uncertainty that came with dating faded, and our time together was untouched by the harshness of shared bills, or health insurance.  It has been practically the best of both worlds and I have truly cherished it.  Though I have no doubt that marriage bring its own set of thrills, I believe that there is something about engagement that is truly special.  It gives much security, without the full responsibility.  

That said, I am immensely excited to get married.  In most ways, very ready and prepared.  In other ways, slightly terrified.  That's kind of a pattern with me and my life choices.  

Sunday my sweetheart and I went out on our last unmarried date.  Tomorrow will be our last Sunday at our lovely little church - the place of our meeting - before we become and Mr. & Mrs.. In the past two years there have been so many firsts, and now, as we broach this great event, there are so many lasts.  

Now for the details!

I find myself shrieking with joy every couple of hours because "Ahh!  I'm getting married!".    

I have my rehearsal outfit picked out and my going away outfit hanging in the closet.  My suitcase is mostly packed, aside from things like makeup, and toothbrushes, and my favorite pair of jeans that I'll probably wash the night before the wedding so I can keep wearing them every single day. 

I am cheating majorly and buying frozen croissants for our post-wedding breakfast.  Can you believe that?  Oddly enough, I didn't seem to have a spare eight hours to make my own puff pastry the week before my wedding.  I might feel worse about that if those Trader Joe's croissants weren't so ridiculously good.  

The mister has a new rain coat and he sent me these dreamy Hunter rain boots.  Can you guess where we are going?  No, not to the rainforest!  Geez... Why would I ever choose to be around spiders and snakes?!  Keep guessing. 

Flowers are ordered and I am so excited to hold my bouquet.  If you haven't gathered my enthusiasm for flowers from my instagram feed, I happen to really, really like flowers.  Like, my closet floor is covered in silk roses right now that will be suspended from the ceiling, and I have two massive orders of fresh flowers to pick up Thursday morning.  Give me all the flowers!

I have practiced my makeup at least half a dozen times and my confidence in doing it is now at a solid 70%.  I'm not even that confident in my ability to walk without tripping most days, so I think we are in a good place. 

Here we are.  Last night, I said goodbye to a whole bunch of very special people that I will not see again until the rehearsal and it felt so strange.  I know so much will stay the same, but at the same time, it never will be what it was.  It's a wonderful, blissful, dreamy kind of different...but different was always a frightening word to me. 

Here we go.  Six days.  A much more approachable to-do list.  A groom I adore.  It's beginning to look a lot like wedding time.

Sincerely, 

Pedantic Foodie

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Two Weeks...

Two weeks.  As I typed that my stomach did a backflip.

Excited.  Anxious.  Nervous.  Unsure.  Enchanted.  Dazed.  It’s all happening. 

I am striving to be present, but instead I find myself in a near-constant dazed and robotic state.  It still does not feel real.  Friends ask me what I have done, and what is left to be done, and I have no answers.  There is just so much that I have no time to list or explain, I simply do.  Wake, eat, work, and alternate between squeals of joy and tears of utter exhaustion.  

I’ve given up on the idea of keeping the massive amounts of “stuff” contained, and so my room slowly grows smaller and more overtaken with each day that passes.  The strange part is, I'm okay with that.  This is from the lady who used to iron her sheets before bed.  Yikes!  Hopefully these are steps to becoming more balanced.

In two weeks, I will be wearing the most beautiful dress I have ever seen, hugging so many dear and much-missed friends and relatives, and smiling more than I ever have before.  In just over two weeks I will be on a plane, darting through the air for my much-anticipated honeymoon. Those promises fill my heart to the brim.  

The marriage license has been obtained, the programs ordered, the dress altered, the thank you gifts bought and wrapped, and the suitcases (halfway) packed. The tasks are becoming fewer as the days slip away.  My pursuit to hold onto these moments is much like trying to grasp at a wet bar of soap.  The countdown blocks are moving so fast and my mind cannot seem to keep up with them.  

Today is my last day of work.  Well, of the work that requires me to leave my home each morning. I am looking forward to trying to get to bed at a more decent hour and beginning my tasks before the sun shows her face.  There’s lots to be done, and so much to be savored.  I do not want to miss a single, beautiful moment of the next fourteen days. 

For now, I get to go care for my now wisdom-toothless fiancé.  Mostly we are just eating a lot of this soup, which happens to be ahhhmazing!  

Thank you so very for joining me on this journey.  More wedding memories/mayhem coming soon.  Oh, and food too.  This is a food blog, after all. 

Sincerely, 

Pedantic Foodie

One Month...

It's real.  For the first time, it feels like this great, fast-approaching event, that has been nearly a year in the making, might be more than just a dream with a Pinterest board.  Yesterday, as I bid my last goodbyes to summer, we hit the one month mark.  

Over the weekend, my dear aunt helped us assemble the first of our major decorations and my heart took a deep sigh of relief when it really did look beautiful.  Up until now, we have had flowers, sequins, and candlesticks scattered about and I have held my breath and hoped that it would all come together in a seamless, cohesive design. 

Now, I sit at my computer flipping through tab after tab of wedding programs.  Literally hundreds of them.  Yet somehow, I still have not found exactly what I had envisioned.  Whyyyyy?  I think I'm a little picky. 

This week, I shot my last pre-wedding recipe with my mother.  It's a very special recipe, with very special memories and I cannot wait to share it with you.  The coming six-week hiatus of testing, baking, and photographing has been months in the making, but now it's done.  Mind you, I still have so many pictures to edit, posts to write, and recipes to type up, but the most daunting portion of the task is done.  And I already miss it.  

My fiancé might finally have his outfit figured out.  Who knew it would take eleven months to find a dusty-blue bow tie?

I do not know what's happening.  Some mornings I wake up and gaze across the room to my little wedding countdown and it feels real.  I know and believe that so much of the reality that I have known for the past twenty-one years will be turned upside-down, and yet so much will stay the same.  Other mornings I wake thinking that I have not woken at all, but am still heavily immersed in the most wonderful of impossible dreams.  It's all very bizarre in the happiest of ways.

I want to soak up these last four weeks, but at the same time I cannot wait for the day to finally arrive.  I'm filled with excitement as my fingers bounce about this keyboard like timid feet across hot coals.  One month.  ONE MONTH!  

I'm a very lucky lady. 

Sincerely, 

Pedantic Foodie